Monday, January 5, 2015

may ALLAH ease

Posted by cahayaberbisikan at 12:03 PM
2nd January 2015.. 19 days more to go before turning to 23.. 

u all guess what????

       i got my abg sado..opppss, not really so sado la..

first of all, i would to take this opportunity to say million thanks to my special one "mr.popeye" and INSYAALLAH to be revealed for the next 3 years..

dear you, 
thanks for your willingness drove all over from your hometown and coming to see me. lucky u just had your "training break" for a week at that time. at first, sumpah! i thought it just u wanna kidding me.. but i didn't expect that it turn into the real one when i can see u face to face...standing in front, talking and share your story with me thanks so much sayang! alhamdulillah, finally, i can see u after almost 1year++ didnt met since the last eid celebration before u undergone your aussie trip..

dear you, 
i am sorry, for every my wrongdoings, spoken words or anything that may hurt u since the last time we met. ya, at some moment i can be so childish. but thanks again for keep on entertained me.. making me laugh and smile non stop while had time together and we had "jalan-jalan" at pasar malam.. silly me (mana tak silly, penat2 je mandi lepas tu we all got "new perfume"..bau ayam percik + asap). being with him, i just need to be myself. i can act the way iam. no need to be other person or "bajet ayu". in fact that, we had been a friend since primary school. of course la we are a classmate too and he know well my "perangai" which sometime like a "gangster" maybe. yes, i'm quite a rough girl in person. people who do not know me very well, will simply said that i'm quite strict plus "sombong".  

dear you,
please take a good care of yourself and your heart too. i dont know what the future bring within this 3 years. but i'm hoping that it will last with the sweetest moment between us. may allah grant us with a bless and blissful "relationship". 

dear you,
u're my birthday present in advance! what a surprise.. never thought this could be turn into the reality as i wish that i could see u even just a seconds. but when u ask me:

    "what present would u want be as your birthday present?" 

at that moment, all i can do is just "terkebil-kebil" coz i really don't have the most "perfect" answer for the question *iguess. im out of my words and in return, i'm just smile instead of answering your question. with u standing beside me, i could never ask for more. darl, tq so much again.

dear you,
INSYAALLAH, i'll always be by your side and pray for your happiness, and career. well, your career sometime need u to be far from your family..and even me sometime seem like can't stand with this unbearable feeling that i miss u so much. 

"bila kau pilih untuk kahwin dengan dia maknanya kau kena kahwin dengan family, karier and hidup dia" 

this is what i'm trying to practice, to stand still by his side, i need to be well mentally and physically prepared. being a navy's wife in future INSYAALLAH, u need to consider and think deeply (honestly,aku yg belum sah jadi wife dia ni pun selalu jgak la meleleh airmata tak tahan rindu sangat kat dia)
some people simply said to me better for me to look for other person that could always stay beside me all the time. but even this LDR is quite tough and not easy for unmarried person like us but i think this could be a better way to teach me to be a honest , more independent i guess..maybe.

"...a good spouse to be, it is not necessary a handsome/pretty one. it is enough if u could find someone with "good looking" because of his/her akhlak. the one can stand by your side through rainy or sunny day and can guide you to the right path. then, he/she will captive your eyes with those kind of things.." #quotemerepekbyme

short conversation while we are in his car:

actually, dia ni in person jarang serius dengan aku time kitorg "date" (not so really date, sng kata xde pun istilah date tu officially utk we all) but at certain time, he will turn to serious person (the part that im not so favour. yela tak boleh nak "memanja") 

he: awak, sorry sangat-sangat sebab tak boleh jumpa awak lama *guilty face

me: ok, dont take it seriously. sy faham (smile, aku mmg xboleh org say sorry ni, nnt nak nangis je rasa)

he: awak, sy memang busy sangat, tapi awak jgn lupa text sy tau..cepat ke lambat sy mesti reply.

me: insyaallah..tapi sedih la sebab awak selalu takde. busy je memanjang.
*me muka sedih

he: nak buat cam mana awak, navy kan? nanti awk datang time sy tauliah ea?

me: tauliah? insyaallah, tapi bulan berapa? sebab takut time tu, sy ada hal lain. PSM kan?

he: bulan 4. nanti awk sekali dgn family sy.

me: blinking eyes. errrr, tengok la nanti mcm mana.

he: nodded *habit biasa dia la tu.

part serious about future

he: awak, sy nk bgtau something ni. paling cepat utk kahwin, lagi 3tahun. 

me: HM, 3 tahun? 
*monolog: 3tahun? hm, sempat aku kerja & kumpul aset sikit2.

he: lepas tauliah, sy nak kerja, beli kereta & rumah. tapi sy 3thun atas kapal at least utk komesen. tapi rumah xtau plak nak beli kat mana. 

me: uwaaaaa, lamanya. why la undang2 navy mcm tu??
*bukan sedih sbb kahwin lambat cuma memikirkan nanti dia terlalu busy dlm tempoh 3tahun tu.

he: klau 3tahun, maknanya 26/27 la kita kahwin.

me: yeayy, sbb sy planning pun nk dlm range umr tu. at least dah ada aset2 sikit2. lagipun ayh sy mmg nak sy kerja dulu pun. tapiiii, sy confuse. nak smbg master ke kerja dulu.. klau master paling cepat +/- 2tahun la cam tu.

he: untgla boleh smbg, klau navy kne kerja dlu baru boleh smbg. tapi klau 3thun tu, maknanya awk dh hbs master la kn?

me: nodded. haah, insyaallah la tu pun kalau sy smbg master la.
lepastu kitorg sambung la merepek-merepek..thats the one that i love about him. he know how to act as different person according to the situation.

most of hiS fav words all the time : "awak tak takut dengan sy ke? sy garang ok."

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